My last day in the 20s... Tomorrow is day 30 in the hospital. Really? Wow... Today marks the change into the 5th week of my life in the hospital. Fun times! (Although, since I am now counting down to a possible discharge home, that does make all the days a little easier! Will I hit day 40 here?)
My favorite day nurse is back from vacation... She was only gone a few days, but I missed her! She is a real sweetheart. We have similar personalities and I like her a lot. My favorite weekend nurse was subbing last night, so I got to see her extra, so hey! Good news all around on the nurse front. (And, as if it couldnt be better, this week, my favorite Resident was back from his vacation to Vegas. So I really cant complain.)
I'm starting to get used to the added pubic pressure now that Maya has turned. It took a few days to realize that no, no one is coming "out", it is just perceived that way because of their lowness. Thank the nurses and Dr B for promising me that I will "KNOW" when they decide they arent hanging out anymore and that low babies are normal and can hang out for a long time. That helped with the mental screwiness of it all.
I've decided that little miss likes to put her feet against my spine because she knows that I will sucker her daddy into rubbing my back, which means she gets a footrub out of the deal! This child is more like me than I dared to realize... (Of course, she already has him wrapped around those adorable fingers of her... It's not like I am surprised.) :) And her brother too!
For your viewing pleasure...
This is what I look like for 60-120 minutes each day (depending on if the floor is busy and they leave me on the monitor for an hour each time). The beige thing is the belly band (this was last night, so I'm in a blue nightgown). There are three monitors. The one of the upper left is the TOCO (contraction monitor), the other two are the HB monitors. Bobby is the lowest and Maya is almost next to the TOCO. They add rolls of tape in between the monitor and band to give slight pressure to keep the sounds flowing.
My IRL friend, BS, asked me a question about the special dinners I talk about on Nicholas, Sophia, and Alexander's special days. She asked if I'd ever blogged about them and I honestly couldnt remember. But I thought I'd post a bit from my email response to her, in case you are wondering why certain things were selected, or in case you've ever thought of memorial dinners as well.
"Peter and I were vegetarians for about... 6 years. No meat at all. When I got pregnant, I fully intended to continue that. But then I had these massive cravings. The major one was pork chops, rice and beans, plantains, and cornbread. It was a "staple" Puerto Rican meal in Peter's home growing up and in our early marriage. So, we decided to give in since we felt that cravings were the body's way of getting nutrition in some way. And I ate it ALL THE TIME. We must have had twice a week and he'd make extra so that I could have it during the week, too! It was bad. I've never eaten so many pork chops per week in all my life. The night Nick was born, I was cooking that meal. After he was born, the entire idea repulsed me. Instead, constantly for those 2w, I craved polish sausage (which I have never cared for), pierogi, broccoli, and garlic english muffins. So, once again, I was eating this constantly. After Sophia was born, nada. So, we decided that, even though they shared the womb, they didnt share taste buds! So, on the 1st of each month (when Nicholas was born) we had "his" dinner and on the 16th, hers. It just felt like the right thing to do. When I got pregnant with Alexander, I craved Peter's grandfather's tuna fish sandwiches and Campbell's tomato soup (no homemade would do!). So Peter would try to recreate the sandwiches. Now because of mercury, I couldnt/wouldnt eat the sandwiches as much as I wanted them, but that actually worked out because I also had a hankering for turkey sandwiches around lunch time! So I could alternate somewhat (which is funny, since Alexander was born near Thanksgiving!). So tuna fish sandwiches and tomato soup are our dinner on the 23rd of each month.
"I had other small cravings too during the pregnancies for other meals. Breakfast before Nick was born had to be Peter's breakfast sandwiches (egg, soy sausage on eng muffin with OJ) and afterwards cream of wheat and milk. Then with Alex, fruit loops with apple or cranberry juice (funny, I know!). Lunches were roast beef sandwiches with the twins and PB&J or Turkey with Alex. They were just such needs and so independent of my own personal tastes. I cant stand milk but with Sophia I just had to have it. All the time. (And with these babies too!)"
These babies have pretty different tastes, as my cravings only go for a week or two and then switch to something else. I've had weeks of wanting nothing but lasagna (and not even good stuff, I mean like buy it in the freezer section of the supermarket lasagna) and now I'm ending a week of wanting daily cheesesteaks (can I just say how repulsed I am by that???). Earlier in the week, it was fried (and it has to be fried!) calamari, another thing I dont eat. So, it's a fun time. But I treasure the cravings, I really do. It's them talking to me. :)
On my brother-in-law's birthday and the anniversary of when he died, our family also celebrates his life with his favorite meal: chicken parm. When he was sick, he didnt really want anything else and my MIL would get up whenever he was hungry, which was sometimes wee morning hours, to make it for him and eat with him. The chemo made him so sick that he couldnt always eat a lot or hold down what he did eat, but when she tells me stories about him and how his eyes lit up when she would start cooking, I know that I would have done the same thing, every day, just for that look and that smile. One day, I will have to scan a pic of Peter and Robert as children and post it. They are two of the most handsome boys (excluding my own "most handsome boys" of course!) I've ever seen, and their love is palatable from the picture...
Well, I'd better go for now. Speaking of my MIL, she is on her way for a visit (and sweetie that she is, she's bringing the kids their much wanted calamari, even though she thinks it is gross too!) and dear "Aunt Sarah" is going to stretch her patience and try to teach me to knit again... If she succeeds, her niece and nephew will get something out of it... Maybe a trapazoid blanket? ;) We shall see...
I so enjoyed reading about your dinners! I knew that you did them, but wasn't exactly sure about the background story. I loved reading your email; it helped me feel like I "know" your little ones just a little more :)
I was also wondering about the dinners. I love it! It's such a special and personal way to remember your babies.
I can't believe that you have been there so long. Where has the time gone. The longer you are there the better for your babies. I can't wait to meet them. I can hear the excitment in your words when you talk about having company today. It must be nice when you have visiters. I'm not sure if I could even eat the calimari even if they craved it! Your a brave girl. (a good mother) Hope your knitting goes well. I just love all the women who knit those little hats.
I have a new perspective on the day of someones passing. Your story brought tears to my eyes.
How wonderful to celebrate the day they went to Heaven with a dinner.
I am going to start doing that for the loved ones I have lost. I am really very excited about this. I have looked upon their passing as a sad day, which it is, but making a dinner celebration will put a new meaning to the day. Thank you.
Aw, Maya already knows how to work the system. A lil girl after my own heart. I'm sure you are right, she will wrap Bobby around her little finger.
It was so lovely to read about the dinners. Sophia and Nicholas obviously did have very different taste buds! How very frustrating, to have a craving for tuna too, at least you could have as much tomato soup as you wanted to keep Alex happy.
And the story of your BIL and his chicken parm has just made me sob all over my computer.
Hope the knitting goes well xx
The dinners brought me to tears. I feel such a connection to what you are going thru. You make it so easy for us to love you and those little ones. I would like to send something but do not have the address. Could you send that me. I would love it. Still praying for you and those little ones daily.
I loved reading your explanations about the dinners. Aren't the cravings amazing? With my little miracle Leo, it was cottage cheese and pez candy (ewwwwwwww I know), and later crab legs. Haha! Keep up the great work.
I found crochet much easier that knitting. You should try and get someone to teach you that. It's quicker...ie you get a payoff from watching it get bigger faster...
that's awsome about the dinners, you gave me an idea of what to do on aaron's birthday, thanks for the idea!! good to see you in happy spirits. i wish i were closer to help with teaching you to knitt!! good luck with that. it's one of my favorite hobbies and i am sure you will find it relaxing too. all my thoughts and prayers.
30 days already! Oh Michele. Keeping you and yours in my heart and prayers xxxx ps and your list on my blog was fantastic!
The dinners are such a neat idea. I think I had a turkey sandwich. :)
I was trying figure out why your story was so familiar to me and then I realized that I first heard it on the CM group Prolife mommies. Wow! Small world.
Your story reminded me of Phoebe from friends. . . She was a vegetarian and when she got pregnant (with triplets) she craved meat so badly.
30 days already. Such a long time! I hope your babies continue to enjoy staying in your belly for a few more weeks. :-D
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