Thursday, April 11, 2013

25w

Here we are, another week passed, another countdown in the running (T-12w6d til delivery!).  And now, 90 days... 90 days left in this pregnancy of over 200. 90 days left until we have a full term baby in our arms.

I don't know if I blogged about this before, but it was on my mind today as I did my morning run (THANK YOU SPRING) in a freshly rained neighborhood.  Last night, we were slammed with a thunderstorm just after dark.  It poured and I fell asleep to the sound of the rain.  By the time I woke up for my 6am-er, the skies were blue and dawn was breaking, and no rain was in sight.  I laced up and out I went for my (SLOW) bout around town.  As I was running, it dawned on me that I havent made a photo album for Michael yet.

With all the other children, I started an album at the beginning of pregnancy and put in different photos from holidays, ultrasounds, etc., around the same time (or shortly after) I began journaling.  They are quite the treasure to us, and the kids love to look at all of them.  As I ran, I thought I really need to get on the ball and do his book! and I began to think about the photographs that would go in it and what I might say.

The books each start with a quote or scriptural reference, so clearly, that would be page one, but then there's usually some 'before you were here' little bit.  What we were doing just before we conceived, etc, etc, and a photo, then onto (very) early pregnancy.  The Marathon! I thought... Of course!  I'll put in a picture of me finishing up the MCM and I'll write a tid bit about running it, blah blah blah.  And, as I'm thinking of this, a very special memory from race morning popped into my head.

I attended a nondenominational service, held in a tent just before the starting area and conducted by a Naval chaplain.  He did a phenomenal job and was able to tie in the readings he'd selected to our coming out to run the MCM that day.  It was a nice way to start the morning and I was really glad that I had the opportunity to go.  As he was ending the service, he gave us a piece of advice and it is one that, to this moment, gives me goosebumps to recount.  "Because you made the time to give this part of your race experience to God, know that God will be with you during today's marathon."  He went on to say that whether we finished or were dragged off the course with injury, to know that our dedication to running was second to our dedication to God and that we'd shown that by coming early and meeting in that tent as rain and hurricane threatened to envelope us.  "Right now, just close your eyes, and tell God what it is that you really want today.  God is listening."

And here is the kicker.  Without any sort of preconceived notion- I mean, I was about to embark on the longest run of my entire life and, really, my thoughts were of getting through those 26+ miles- this is the thought that came into my head: God, I would love to have a healthy, full term pregnancy and baby.  As soon as the thought came, I opened my eyes, shocked, and looked around at my fellow runners, heads still bowed in personal prayer and wondering if those words had come from my mouth because they sure as hell sounded loud to me.  I took a deep breath, closed my eyes again, and asked for a good race that would result in me being able to run across the finish line.  Amen, prayer said, let's roll.

The unbidden thought left me shortly after as I tried to stay warm and dry and, eventually, meandered up to the starting point and my shoot.  But I thought about the crazy thought, especially on my train ride home when I was reliving every moment of the day in my head and hoping we'd beat Hurricane Sandy into Philadelphia.  When I saw Peter at the station and flung myself into his waiting arms, the race was the last thing on my mind until we talked about it in the car, and I relayed the events, including my strange prayer, to him.  We kind of joked about it, saying that we'd said we'd give it our all until NYE 2013, so hey!  Maybe that was where it was coming from.

That was October 28th. 3 days later, I conceived Michael. 

Not to sound crazy, but it does still seem crazy to me.  I'm not saying that going to the prayer service or saying the prayer or running the race or anything else is the definitive thing that led us to this miracle pregnancy.  I believe each of us has a path and that we come into this world for a reason; Michael has his reason, just as we being his parents has a reason and one that we may never know.  But still... It does send shivers up my spine and I recount the story and as I think about writing it as the introduction to his photo album.

Back to present day: 25 weeks!  Here we are!  Less than 2 weeks til my next appointment with Dr. B. and my sugar test.  And only a few days until Peter is off for a week!  He's working tomorrow and then we have full fledged family time from Saturday until Sunday, the 21st!  WOO HOO!  I see minigolf (Maya saw the pics of Bobby playing and REALLY wants to play now), long walks, playground visits, and trips to the museum and library in our future! :)

I feel great.  Still some BHCs at night after a long day (but nothing consistent), still tired (my MIL commented that I actually seemed more tired than usual yesterday), and still out running.  So, it's awesome and good and I feel truly lucky to be able to experience all of this in such a normal fashion this time around! 

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