Friday, March 20, 2009

Happy Spring

A little after 7am, Spring ushered in... (Religious Tolerance can explain a variety of different religious beliefs associated with this time of year, when light and dark are equal...) Some places saw snow (banish the thought!), but we only had a light rain that finished before we left for church this morning. It started off a little gloomy but by the time I was on the highway towards Dr. Lee's, the sun had come out and I needed sunglasses.

I made it to Dr. Lee's half an hour early. My appointment was 15 minutes later than normal (8:45am) and since I leave right after Mass, I usually get there 15 minutes early anyway. I went to the local Panera and had some decaf and a carb filled breakfast. (bagel, anyone???) You can almost see Dr. Lee's from the Panera, and anytime I see a couple, I'm practically convinced that they must be waiting for a consult, procedure, or appointment. I'm sure they are perfectly normal and just having breakfast, but since Peter and I have spent many a morning there, I can't get my fertility impaired glasses off... My girlfriend, Meg, called, and we chatted while I had my breakfast. We usually catch up via email, but sometimes a chat is nice, too. :) Her baby shower is this weekend. I've picked up a couple of things, but still have something else I wanted to get. I dont know if I will get out tonight or tomorrow. (I hate BabiesRUs on a weekend- it's always an absolute nightmare.)

A stick and vial of blood later, I was on my way. I'm still waiting for results, not that they will tell us much. Too bad they don't do hCG tests every day after possible implantation!

I'm still taking my temperature each morning. Yesterday, I was 97.5 and today 97. Implantation dip, maybe? Is mucus a sign of impantation? I'll have to go check out Dr. Google... I'm trying to think positive, but I'm on edge. To the point that I did something I shouldn't have done at work. Our little staff refrigerator needs to be defrosted. Since no one else would do it, I took it downstairs to our larger kitchen and opened it over the sink to let it melt out. I know I shouldnt have. The thing was probably no heavier than a full bookcart, but without the wheels. I didn't get hurt or anything (just a little winded) but there was still no point in doing it. I could have just as easily have asked Peter to stop by and help me some evening instead of doing it myself. I do this. When I feel like my dreams are impossible, I actually do things that aren't smart, just to reinforce that what I think/want must be impossible. It makes no sense. I know that. Yet, I do it anyway and dont think until afterwards, when I regret it.

Hopefully, I'll get results within the next hour... or two... or three... The earliest I've gotten progesterone only results has been around 2pm. The latest- almost 4:30!

2 comments:

Donna said...

I hope you get good news this afternoon!

Mommy (You can call me OM) said...

I followed the link about the equinox. Your baby or babies could be born at Christmas!
Yes, do stop the self sabotage. Think first. Act second. :)
I'm very optimistic for you and Peter.
Peace.