This year, it's Father's Day... But in 2008, it was the day that we lost our 4th baby to an early miscarriage. I remember that year because Peter's biggest prayer for Father's Day was that we would still be pregnant and our little baby would be hanging on. Father's Day was the 15th, and I was so grateful to have his prayer granted, even if it meant we began miscarrying the very next day.
This year, so similar and yet so different. Father's Day... still pregnant... quite pregnant, actually, and preparing for our 10th child... our 3rd living child... in a bit over a month.
For Father's Day, we're having Michael's name engraved on the back of Peter's watch, along with the names of his older brothers and sisters. (My Mother's Day gift is the addition of his birthstone to my mother's ring, which we wont take to the jeweler until July 1st... just to be sure it is, indeed, a ruby!). Peter asked me to make ribs for dinner, so we'll have folks over for that, and the kids made him a special gift in school before the term ended. And cake... of course, there's cake: dark chocolate with raspberries, Peter's fave.
But, amidst the joy and celebration, the kisses and snuggles, and all the love we can muster, there is the reminder of our three oldest who will never make gifts in school or bake cakes, the memories of the four smallest of our babes who never lived outside the womb, and of them, especially that sweet little boy that left us on this day, five years ago.