And then it was my turn. If holding them separately is a place in heaven, then I have no words for what holding them together can be. It was indescribable. Just to have them both in my arms... They were reunited after 13 days apart. It was beautiful to be a part of that (but we forgot to get a picture of all of us together!)
The nurse was nice; she's had them once before and I see her when I'm there frequently. Bobby was also on a canula when we got there. Peter asked her about both and she confirmed that she felt it was overkill, that she wouldnt have done it. Yes, she said, they have had fewer/shorter apnea/bradycardia spells but that what they were having before is normal for their age and they were fine without the canulas. They arent on any oxygen, there is just flow so that, when they forget to breathe, it gives them a nudge and says "hey, breathe!" It felt better to have a nurse agree and say that the babies dont need them, even if this isnt considered a "set back". You can tell they dont like them and Maya pulls at the tape at her face and will cry. She said that they usually keep them on for a week and then ween them back from the flow until it is 0 (they are at a pressure of 1). Peter wants them taken off now because he thinks it is pointless and would prefer that they were learning their responses, since they were doing so well without it. We both agreed that we would discuss it with one of our favorite nurses or nurse practitioners and see what would be best for the babies. Peter's primary concern is that the a.m. nurse from yesterday basically put them on the canulas because she didnt like that they went from CPAP to nothing. It has shortened the duration of the drifts, but hasnt taken them away, which is what the nurse had argued it would do. Bobby had more than yesterday and Maya, although she had more yesterday, had one with us there last night without hiccups, all while she was pulling on the canula. So, neither of us are really sure how this is helping. But, as I said, we will talk to them more. If it isnt helping or hurting, there is no reason to keep it. If it is helping, that is another story, and sometimes you have to have the babies uncomfortable so that they get better.
Bobby gave Daddy a very stinky diaper. VERY STINKY. It was kind of funny... By the time I was finished holding them, I was leaking all over the place. The front of my wrap had huge spots on it. Once Bobby was back in his isolette, Peter handled his care while I pumped.
I drove to and from the hospital. Peter wanted me to have my first driving with him since I will be going alone on Thursday morning. It was no problem at all. In fact, today has been the first day I've felt somewhat normal. Still sore, still in pain, but I've gotten around better as the day has worn on.
Well, it is time to pump before bed, so nighty night to me!