The physical therapist did her first assessment yesterday. Both babies did well. Starting post 31 gestational weeks (which we hit on Saturday), she will come and spend 20 minutes with each baby Monday through Friday. She assesses their muscle tone and development, stimulates movement, and gives them infant massage. The therapist was very nice and detailed what she was doing to each baby and why.
Last night, we attended the annual NICU fundraiser. We saw both docs who were in the delivery room when Bobby and Maya were born, plus an additional neonatologist who took care of them and the head of the department at all the hospitals. We bid in the silent auction (won an awesome pottery bowl) but we left before the 50/50 raffle, leaving our tickets with a couple whose twins were in the NICU for 3 months (they are 18 months old now and doing very well). They told us they would donate the money back if we won. We got there around 6pm and left around 7:30pm. It was a buffet style dinner, which worked really well, since we were able to eat and then leave for the hospital, to make it in time for holdings!
It was strange to dress up. I havent worn make up in years (I'd say at least 5?? Maybe more?) yet my face, yesterday, decided to become uber-blotchy so I thought, what the heck! Why not! (Makeup has a shelf life and I should toss the stuff I have out...) So, I put it on and remembered (other than my laziness) all the reasons why I never wear it. Peter was quite shocked when he came in and saw me in it. I lasted about 2 hours. When I got to the hospital, I scrubbed it off (I even packed some face wash wipes in my diaper bag so I could get it off). It was so nice to be "free" again. I think this was my sign. Toss the old makeup. You arent going to wear it anymore. Breakouts are only temporary and said blotchy patches (there were 2 of them) werent worth the gross feeling. And, of course, one is gone and the other is on the way out the door...
So, I had a drink... 2 actually. 2 glasses of wine. I asked our nurse (who asked one of the breastfeeding consultants) how long it would take the 8oz or so to clear my system. She gave me a great article about it with a chart and told me to wait about 3.5 hours to be on the safe side. I also found a groovy website this morning and typed in my info and got a similar response. I took my first drink around 6pm, so basically, the chart (and calculator) said I could pump after 9:30 and be okay. I pumped around 10:30 and got 4 ounces. It's in the fridge downstairs. I know that science shows that breastmilk doesnt accumulate alcohol and that alcohol metabolizes back into the body (so pumping and dumping isnt really needed) but I still worry... What if... I have a good tolerance for booze, so I'm not too worried that my milk is polluted, but still... What if... Even a little bit... Peter says that he's sure it is fine (but that if I want to leave it for his cereal, that is fine too- EWW! YUCK!). I dont know.... My 4:45am pumping gave me 180ml... I'm almost wondering if I should just count my blessings (I dont know what I will get on this pumping...) and not bother with last night's pump. I dont know... I really dont want to take the chance (I guess I've answered my own question...) Needless to say the wine wasnt good enough to cause me so much mental worry, so that wont happen again!
I am expecting today to be another good day (is that tempting the fates?)... The babies continue to blow everyone's expectations out of the water. Good Irish stock, I tell Peter... I want, so badly, to believe that all is going to be okay, but every time in pregnancy I have felt that way, the other shoe drops and tells me how wrong I am. I feel such a guarded optimism and, honestly, I want to be ignorant again. I want to believe that babies dont die. That everything is going to be just fine because there is no other way for it to be. People assume that once your children live, life is great again. But it isnt. I dont think it ever becomes that way. It is a blessing and a curse; it shows you how wonderful life is while showing you exactly what you missed and continue to miss.
We'll be putting the car seats in the car this week... And the stroller... We want to let them air out and, at some point, the twins will have their carseat tests. And then (double gulp) they will come home. Since we dont know when that day will be put it could be as soon as 2 and a half more weeks, I figure why not... The fates be damned...
(updated pics here)