Sunday, May 17, 2009

Thursday's 10w5d appointment

First, my apologies for not writing before now. Everything has been a whirlwind since Thursday and I have been too overwhelmed. Who thought not working would have me unable to sit at my computer?

Thursday went very well. We had a 3:45 appointment, although we weren't seen for an hour. Poor Dr. Bailey had been up since 1:30am and, when we arrived at 3:30, was delivering a baby. Poor guy looked exhausted! But he was still chipper and attentive. I hope I'm like that when I've had only 2 hours of sleep (he didn't get out of the hospital until 11pm the night before- eek!)! Both babies were doing beautifully! They were asleep when the ultrasound began. When Zoë was woken up, she just waved her hands around until the annoyance passed her by, then rolled over and went back to sleep. (Peter, anyone???) Maya, on the other hand, like the drama queen clone she is, had a fit. Arms, legs flying around. Moving like a crack addict, she was PISSED off! Dr. Bailey chuckled that it is amazing to see their developed personalities already. That it is. They were both so very cute and hearing their loud, quick heartbeats is music to my ears. I still cry every time.

Sleeping Zoë

Sleeping Maya

My cervix, deceptive little $^#&$% that it is, measured 5. FIVE. Can you freaking believe it? Dr. Bailey commented sadly that, if someone just randomly looked at the shots of it, they'd never believe I have a true case of incompetent cervix. As we were leaving the hospital, I had a good cry over my cervix. Why does it have to look so fine? Why cant it look like the screwed up mess it really is?

My operating length (3) looked good and Dr. Bailey was pleased. We discussed when to start my 50mg of Indocin (3 doses on Monday, 8 hours apart) and the surgery, then our appointment was over. Our nurse wished us good luck and we were on our way.

We went farther into Philly for our CSS meeting, which focused a lot on our educational backgrounds and issues of privacy and discipline. We left at 7:30 and didn't get home until 9. Thank you, construction on 76. Lovely... It was a long day and night...

Friday, I left at 6am for Lankenau, where I had my 2 hours of pre-Admission testing. I was tired and hungry, since I fasted. (Fasting pregnant woman??? Really, not fun... Not cool at all...) 3 vials of blood, a cup of urine, an EKG (fine), and blood pressure screening (also fine) combined with 2 nurses consults and a consult with the anesthesiologist who explained the finer points of a spinal and epidural (and why she would like to avoid general anesthesia with me). I am coming to terms with the fact that a huge ass needle is going to be stuck in my back. I'm not excited about this. This is why I took natural childbirth classes. To avoid the needle! But, as she explained politely, it is impossible for Dr. Bailey to perform the surgery safely without the drugs. So a needle it is. Fun times. Poor Peter is still steaming over the fact that he has to wait in the waiting room and can't go into the OR with me. I asked him to hold onto the St. Gerard handkerchief and the special baby rosary blessed by Pope Paul VI and to just pray for the babies while I'm in surgery for the hour. While everyone tells me how safe it is (less than 5% chance of something happening), as you all know- especially those who have lost a child- a 5% chance, when it comes to your baby, is huge. You'd rather rip your own eye out than put them at risk- any risk. Unfortunately, it's 5% or it's the damn certain 100% that we'll lose them before the next 10 weeks have passed.

The weekend has gone by okay. I blew our plans to go to Jim Thorpe on Sophia's 15 month birthday because I felt so lousy. I spent the rest of Friday and all day Saturday either in bed or on the couch. Just so tired! Saturday, during the end prayers at morning Mass, I had to run out of the chapel to the bathroom, so I could dry heave the breakfast I didnt have. Poor Peter came into the ladies room to check on me before the Rosary, which he ended up leading. When I got home, it was bedtime. He brought me breakfast and lunch in bed (I know... So sweet...) Then, when I finally drug my butt downstairs, he held me while I took another nap! Later in the day, my very pregnant friend, Meg, dropped by and we chatted for a few hours. Then, more resting until Sophia's dinner.

Perhaps, we will get to Jim Thorpe sometime today, if the weather holds out!


k@lakly said...

Great news. I'll be thinking of you all week.

nikki wood said...

I was sooooo scared of the edpidural when I had David by c-section. I think I was more scared of the needle than being cut open lol. But it was really nothing. A little pinch with the numbing shot and then I felt nothing. It was a lot better than I ever imagined, and I am horrible with needles! I hope that helps :) Good luck!

Mommy (You can call me OM) said...

I'm glad to hear you are hanging in there. I'm praying for you every step of the way.

I'm confused. I think I missed something. Do you KNOW they are girls and have you already named them? I need to go back a few posts.

Peace, my friend!

Living With Loss said...

I'm so pleased all is going well - cute scan piccies! And it's so sweet that they each have their own personality already.

I will be thinking of you and your babies on Tuesday and am wishing you loads of luck and hoping so much that all goes well.

Gabby said...

That's so funny - I was thinking the same thing as the previous commenter about their seemingly girl names!

It was WONDERFUL to see the ultrasounds today!! They are beautiful - and it is incredible that they have little personalities already!

I know you are nervous for your surgery, I don't blame you! Keep the faith, it sounds very safe. Just please ask Dr Bailey to get a good night's sleep before. Just kidding. Sort of.

I need to find out about CSS. I don't think I know what you are talking about. I'll go do some back reading.

Hope today is a great day!

Alisha said...

Wow! They are adorable and perfect! Do you really already know the sexes? That is amazing to me! I am 2 weeks since my last u/s and still have 3 weeks to go to my NT scan. I think I may call and see if I can get an u/s tomorrow. 5 weeks is too long to wait!

Baby Smiling In Back Seat said...

Glad your ultrasound went well.

Good luck with the surgery.

I hope you make it to Jim Thorpe someday soon.

Kandi Ann said...

I too had an incompetent Cervix, the thing with yours is, I believe with all my heart God is letting yours be ok till you can have the surgery. Prayers are going with you. Rest as much as you can. Kandi

one-hit_wonder said...

I wanted to say thanks for your support on my blog - it means a lot to me. And I am rooting for you and your little ones!

Lynda said...

Your babies are beautiful, they will be in my prayers :)

Donna said...

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. I hope everything goes smoothly! That 5% chance is so scary - but it is the safest thing for you to do.

Did you already find out the sex of the babies??? How did you manage that?

I hope your MS starts to subside soon. I know I'll be elated when mine does. It stinks!

Tash said...

Just wanted to let you know that you'll be in my thoughts tomorrow. You're handling this with an amazing amount of calm and grace (and humor!) -- I'd be typing expletives from under the couch. Your docs sound really on the ball. Not sure if this helps, but my attitude with statistics lately is to chuck them out the window and rest on the basic premise of probability: something will happen, or it won't. You could read that rather negatively (50%?!), but lately I find it very freeing. Not to mention it's always better going into something like this looking perfect -- at least in my head.

Sending you all love. See you on the other side.