Sunday, September 26, 2010

Leaving Them Alone

As much as it hurt, we left the babies alone for most of the day yesterday.   It's crazy, when you think that we left them alone for much of their first two months on earth, that now, the idea is so foreign.  But I didnt have a choice then; I have that choice now.

Peter and I were both in the bridal party of dear friends of ours who married yesterday (incidentally on the 11th year marker of our wedding, which sometimes get's missed in light of our earlier anniversary celebrations, LOL). I left the house at 7am and Peter left around 10am; we returned at a quarter of 11pm last night.  And, although I had a great time with "the girls" and the wedding was beautiful, I missed them.  So very much.

My MIL and the "aunties" (what Peter affectionately nicknamed Sarah and her sister, Beth) came and spent the day.  For a three hour stretch, the preteen daughter of a friend who just trained to be a babysitter, came as well. The kids had a blast and didnt melt down until nighttime, when their bedtime routine was thrown off.  When I talked to Sarah she said, "it's obvious they miss you".  The feeling was mutual.  Coming home and seeing Bobby draped across his grandmother and Maya passed out on the mattress we put in the dining room, my heart melted.  I couldnt rip my gown off and wash my face quick enough.  For ease, I'd already dismantled my hair in the car.  I just wanted them in my arms.

Which happened around 3am, when Maya woke up crying.  I ran to her and,when she saw me, she clapped her hands and smiled.  At me.  At her mommy.  I scooped her up and she kissed me on the cheek and hugged my neck.  God, is there any better feeling in the world?  I took her back to bed with me and she was asleep before I even laid down.  And we coslept happily there until the sun broke through the window.

We missed our 5K this morning, but I dont care.  It was worth it for the extra snuggles with Maya, and for the smile and kiss that Bobby greeted me with when he woke up and Peter brought him in.

I missed them.  But seeing them see me, that was almost worth it.


MicheleL said...

Isn't that just the best feeling??? My daughter is 8 but is still so attached to me. I remember one night I'd been gone when she went to bed and she came looking for me. When she realized I was in bed she just got in bed, grabbed on to me and was almost purring . . . Mommy . . . I still love it.

Catherine W said...

Oh it is so ridiculously hard to leave them. And it does seem crazy when we had to leave our children alone so much during their first few months of life.

It is lovely to be welcomed back again isn't it?!

Debby@Just Breathe said...

I am sure the wedding was fun but knowing your children are at home is always hard on the heart. How sweet of Maya to clap when she saw you. Sounds like you had a perfect night of sleep.

one-hit_wonder said...

isn't it wonderful to have kids who are so AWARE of you? i love it. sorry you had to miss time with them, though!