Learning to breathe again after the deaths of my twins, Nicholas & Sophia, my son, Alexander, and 6 miscarriages... and finding joy on the journey with my sweet preemie twins, Bobby & Maya, and our miracle TAC singletons, Michael, Lucas, and Ana.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Why?
Why do people do this? I mean, really? Like you have that little in your life that you need to write stuff like this?
The sad thing is, I believe in free speech... Even when it is disgusting.
44 comments:
Anonymous
said...
It takes a lot of time and lots of vitriol and lack of empathy for someone to write such a length diatribe aimed at a specific person they've never met before. It's a shame people don't look in the mirror a little more before posting such hate. I think I'm just as baffled as you.
That is so wrong, people like that make you lose faith in mankind... I have read your blog and you are such an inspiration to me; it is so clear in your blog that you love your children sooo much!! That is so beautiful and so precious, you are an amazing mother. I applaud you for wanting to homeschool :) I was homeschooled and plan to homeschool my boys.
Oh. My. Gawd. I cannot believe that person. No seriously my jaw is on the floor. Some people have too much time on their hands and are so ignorant and plain cruel. There has got to be a way to report this person. I'm so sorry.
Omg I just came over cause of Tiffany reposting this to get you some support...this is DISGUSTING...and how she speaks about the babies THAT ARE LOVED AND CARED ABOUT is just pathetic..im so sorry sweety, she may be directing it to your site, but she is SPEAKING ABOUT ALL OF US....this is YOUR space and you are sharing YOUR life wtf is she to even think that she is going to be spared this pain?? I believe in freedom of speech to but I DO NOT believe in bashing and hate crimes..and what she is saying about the babies is exactly that...if you are reading this lady you are a pathetic excuse for a human being..leave BLMs alone and pick on the sick bastards that are child rapists and worse out there...let this poor woman grieve her baby how ever she seems fit to do it...you disgust me and you are a poor excuse for a woman!!!
(((hugs))) to you...this is just very upsetting i wish I could leave HER my opinions of her, but she is too coward to add comments to her posting!!
Wow, that person must live such a sad, hate filled life. I don't understand it either.
It's very obvious how much you love all of your children and how proud of them you are, and rightfully so! You can honestly say that you have inspired others.
I am very sorry there are cold hearted people out there with nothing better to do. Don't you believe a word of their garbage.
yikes. i'm so sorry you had to have such abuse aimed at you. that was truly horrifying to read! the person who wrote it sounds like they need some counseling and/or meds of their own. s/he obviously has a lot of problems, anger, etc. and i pity him or her for going through life feeling that way. i wonder if there is a way to report that content as inappropriate to the angelfire host. if there's no way to find out who wrote it, maybe you could ask that it be removed. i know you believe in free speech, but there's also such a thing as defamation of character.
As someone who lost my daughter at 21 weeks I am so deeply offended by this persons words. Our daughter was not "tissue" she was a person. She did have features and a face and we did love on her. Wow, I am sitting here with tears. I just can't imagine how someone can judge others pain so cruelly. It makes me sad that there is such hate in this world.
How did you come across this? I am so sorry. What a heartless person and she had no right. She even mentions names, how could she. I can not believe what I was reading. My heart goes out to you. ((HUGS))
I so wanted to leave a comment on that...but like most faceless cowards, they rarely give you the option. I can't imagine what you must be feeling after reading that. Nor can I even begin to imagine the pain you've endured over losing your children. My hope for you is that you don't let cr@p like that harm you. You are a wonderful mother to ALL your babies. The person who wrote that only proves that there is truly evil in this world. I am so sorry you've had to suffer this.
This upsets me so much. I am also a mother to lost baby twin boys. I gave birth at 19 1/2 weeks on August 4th, 2010. I am an infertility patient as well. People like her are disgusting. She needs to find the real God. She is not God. We don't know why he gives and takes away, but that is his decision. If they were not meant to be here with us even for a short time, he would not send them to us to carry. I have been told to my face before that "this is God's way of telling you that you are not meant to be parents." Really you talk to God in person and he told you this??? Ya don't think so. Your babies are precious lives. A baby is alive from day one. There are beautiful and I cried to see their pictures. God bless you and your family.
May I ask how you found this? What she wrote that is?
I was going to write a post on my homeschooling page and mistyped the blog name, so google returned a search screen and as I was about to click on my blog (which came up first), I saw this and clicked on it.
WOW! How dare she! I couldn't read the whole thing but what i read is enough. How horribly mean and insensitve, and honestly just plane ignorant. Just b/c she has read does not mean she understands your struggle so she should want to keep her mouth shut. I'd like to say hopefully she won't have to go through what we've gone through but at this moment it would be a lie. But i do hope that she gains some kind of understanding. Sending you HUGS and tell her if it's so Disturbing to Stay Off your blog.
Michelle, I found your link through my friends page (Antoinette)....I am so incredibly sickened and sorry for you having to even read this and sorry for the coward that wrote it. What a sick piece of trash to act as if she/he knows all & knows what any parent that looses a child should do. She wants to play judge so badly maybe she should take a look at her life or better read read a book (The Shack is great) about judging. Really wish that person wasn't such a coward.
Again, so very sorry you have had to deal with such trash. May peace be with you.
Michelle, I found your link through my friends page (Antoinette)....I am so incredibly sickened and sorry for you having to even read this and sorry for the coward that wrote it. What a sick piece of trash to act as if she/he knows all & knows what any parent that looses a child should do. She wants to play judge so badly maybe she should take a look at her life or better read read a book (The Shack is great) about judging. Really wish that person wasn't such a coward.
Again, so very sorry you have had to deal with such trash. May peace be with you.
First of all, I admittedly did not read the entire piece (too many words of too little substance).
After skimming it, however, I went ahead and clicked on the link to this "nutjob's" website. I thought something was wrong with my computer when the link sent me back to you. Then I realized, "she is talking about YOU!"
Um, seriously? She obviously has no clue. I do hope this isn't bothering you; its not worth your effort.
People like this say they are disgusted and whatnot. If they are so disgusted then why do they linger and read through posts and look at pictures. If I was disgusted by something I sure as heck wouldn't do that. I'd just leave and forget about it. Sorry they are pointing you out. Ridiculous.
Oh Michele... I am so sorry. That little "essay" has me furious on your behalf. People who have never experienced losses just don't get it, this we know, but to be so openly critical and judgmental for absolutely no reason is just beyond normal ignorance and inconsideration. {hugs}
This is baffling to me. I stopped reading after a paragraph because I was disgusted by the content and because I didn't want that person to have the satisfaction of being read.
May I ask how you found this? I sure wish you hadn't seen it. :( Some people are so full of hatred. And this is further proof to me that, unless you've experienced infertility and babyloss, you cannot understand it. So many 'fertiles' are so completely devoid of empathy for those of us who have struggled.
I should have left a comment long ago. I've been reading your blog for a while now. I've been so touched by your words. My son was born the same month as Maya & Bobby - I was on bedrest for my pregnancy & came across your blog that way... Anyway, I just wanted to finally say thank you for sharing your words, your faith, and your love through your blog.
I could only read some of what this person wrote before I stopped. It was heartless. I then clicked to the main page of their blog - even more clear that there is something really sad & wrong with this person. I'm sorry that this person decided to take out their own misery and pain on you and your life.
Dear Michele, please take down the link. That jerk doesn't deserve any traffic thanks to you. My stomach hurt, I couldn't even finish reading it. Why is there so much hatred, so much needless cruelty in this world? I'm so sorry hon. *hugs*
What an ugly soul that woman has. I am not at all surprised that she has comments turned off on that post - she must realize how disgusting and wrong she is. How dare she call your babies - all of our babies - "tissue"? When do babies become "babies" in her mind?
I am just so sorry that you had to come across such ugliness and hatred, Michele.
I don't comment enough but I just had to say that I am so sorry you even had to read that! I couldn't even read the whole thing, it was just horrible and disgusting! Doesn't make sense how someone could write such vile things about your family and the other families as well. I'm happy you have your babies (and the memory of all your babies) to snuggle tonight and I hope you realize the author must have nothing.
Just so we're clear Michelle... I've lost a baby in infancy... and I consider your "miscarriages" just as devastating a loss as what we went through with my baby girl.. They are your children. They all had birthdays and due dates and futures unfulfilled.
Ignore this idiot. She clearly has her own effed up issues and seriously, this is all about her, not you.
And to have a go at us smiling with our babies? Um, hello, we DO LOVE THEM. The photo of me kissing Jordan was taken when she was dying. Is that disgusting too?
So sorry Michele. There are some bored and nasty people out there.
Oh my word. I feel like I just wasted 10 minutes of my life reading that. I am speechless, and feel horrible for you.... I can't believe that someone would take the time to write such filth. How in the world did they even come across your blog.. and if they didn't like what they saw, why would they not just X out of it and never look at it again? From what they wrote, it sounded like they read every single one of your posts on ALL of your blogs. I know you know that the things they said weren't true, but I just wanted to say that I think it's great that you got SO many comments on this post, from people who support you. I think the way you remember your children is beautiful.
Oh my word. I feel like I just wasted 10 minutes of my life reading that. I am speechless, and feel horrible for you.... I can't believe that someone would take the time to write such filth. How in the world did they even come across your blog.. and if they didn't like what they saw, why would they not just X out of it and never look at it again? From what they wrote, it sounded like they read every single one of your posts on ALL of your blogs. I know you know that the things they said weren't true, but I just wanted to say that I think it's great that you got SO many comments on this post, from people who support you. I think the way you remember your children is beautiful.
That made me cry and made me so angry. I'm so sorry you had to read that awfulness! I couldn't actually read most of it because I was so disgusted for you.
:( Bless you beautiful. You are the exact opposite of that nasty picture that they tried to paint of you. Some people make me so so very sick.
You are inspiring, sweet and they way you honour and cherish each of your children is truly beautiful. Although I'm sure you know that <3
Michele, I'm so sorry you had to read that. What a terrible thing to say. I couldn't even read all of it. You are an amazing person and you've been such a great support to SO MANY of us.
For the record, I love that you post pictures of your children. They are beautiful.
Please don't believe a word of that rant. Your blog gives people hope.
It's hard for me to say, but I hope that person never has to feel that pain that you have gone through. That they never realize why you need this blog and why the ALI community needs you.
I'm so so so so so so sorry Michelle. How can someone be so HIDEOUSLY evil to another human? EVEN one they don't know?
Please take all of our warm wishes and love and block out that shit. I wish the coward had identified him or herself in some way. How in the hell does he/she know how one "should" grieve, and what right to put out that hideous diatribe??
There are such disgusting people out there..why would you go to such lengths to patronize and criticize someone else's pain, especially when they haven't experienced it before. I just don't understand it..How did you even find that site? Don't tell me they sent you the link. Bloody rubbish of society.
44 comments:
It takes a lot of time and lots of vitriol and lack of empathy for someone to write such a length diatribe aimed at a specific person they've never met before. It's a shame people don't look in the mirror a little more before posting such hate. I think I'm just as baffled as you.
These kinda people are sick in the head,or just plain heartless if you ask me.
I'm so sorry Michele. So, so sorry. (((hugs)))
The person that needs counseling is the person that wrote that post. It's called empathy and respect for the grief of others.
And yes, even in the second trimester, children have recognizable features of their parents. Saw it many times, sadly, when working L & D.
That is so wrong, people like that make you lose faith in mankind... I have read your blog and you are such an inspiration to me; it is so clear in your blog that you love your children sooo much!! That is so beautiful and so precious, you are an amazing mother.
I applaud you for wanting to homeschool :) I was homeschooled and plan to homeschool my boys.
Oh. My. Gawd. I cannot believe that person. No seriously my jaw is on the floor. Some people have too much time on their hands and are so ignorant and plain cruel. There has got to be a way to report this person. I'm so sorry.
I am so sorry. What a cruel and heartless person.
Omg I just came over cause of Tiffany reposting this to get you some support...this is DISGUSTING...and how she speaks about the babies THAT ARE LOVED AND CARED ABOUT is just pathetic..im so sorry sweety, she may be directing it to your site, but she is SPEAKING ABOUT ALL OF US....this is YOUR space and you are sharing YOUR life wtf is she to even think that she is going to be spared this pain?? I believe in freedom of speech to but I DO NOT believe in bashing and hate crimes..and what she is saying about the babies is exactly that...if you are reading this lady you are a pathetic excuse for a human being..leave BLMs alone and pick on the sick bastards that are child rapists and worse out there...let this poor woman grieve her baby how ever she seems fit to do it...you disgust me and you are a poor excuse for a woman!!!
(((hugs))) to you...this is just very upsetting i wish I could leave HER my opinions of her, but she is too coward to add comments to her posting!!
it was hard for me to read that. I cant believe people like that. omg im so sorry.
I have no words.
Wow, that person must live such a sad, hate filled life. I don't understand it either.
It's very obvious how much you love all of your children and how proud of them you are, and rightfully so! You can honestly say that you have inspired others.
I am very sorry there are cold hearted people out there with nothing better to do. Don't you believe a word of their garbage.
yikes. i'm so sorry you had to have such abuse aimed at you. that was truly horrifying to read! the person who wrote it sounds like they need some counseling and/or meds of their own. s/he obviously has a lot of problems, anger, etc. and i pity him or her for going through life feeling that way. i wonder if there is a way to report that content as inappropriate to the angelfire host. if there's no way to find out who wrote it, maybe you could ask that it be removed. i know you believe in free speech, but there's also such a thing as defamation of character.
As someone who lost my daughter at 21 weeks I am so deeply offended by this persons words. Our daughter was not "tissue" she was a person. She did have features and a face and we did love on her. Wow, I am sitting here with tears. I just can't imagine how someone can judge others pain so cruelly. It makes me sad that there is such hate in this world.
How did you come across this? I am so sorry. What a heartless person and she had no right. She even mentions names, how could she. I can not believe what I was reading.
My heart goes out to you. ((HUGS))
I so wanted to leave a comment on that...but like most faceless cowards, they rarely give you the option. I can't imagine what you must be feeling after reading that. Nor can I even begin to imagine the pain you've endured over losing your children.
My hope for you is that you don't let cr@p like that harm you. You are a wonderful mother to ALL your babies. The person who wrote that only proves that there is truly evil in this world.
I am so sorry you've had to suffer this.
I am so disgusted by this person. I am so sorry that this had to happen to you. This is cruel!!! You are an amazing mother. ((HUGS))
DH says she sounds like the women in silent hill.
that aside, even I who has never had a loss much less a pregnancy would consider a miscarriage the loss of a baby.
what a lunatic
hmmm can't leave comments, bummer...wonder why....
i am so sorry.....just plain heartless.
i couldn't even finish the posting....((hugs))
I don't have any words, other than that person's are truly disturbed and twisted, and I am so, so sorry you were subjected to them.
This upsets me so much. I am also a mother to lost baby twin boys. I gave birth at 19 1/2 weeks on August 4th, 2010. I am an infertility patient as well. People like her are disgusting. She needs to find the real God. She is not God. We don't know why he gives and takes away, but that is his decision. If they were not meant to be here with us even for a short time, he would not send them to us to carry. I have been told to my face before that "this is God's way of telling you that you are not meant to be parents." Really you talk to God in person and he told you this??? Ya don't think so. Your babies are precious lives. A baby is alive from day one. There are beautiful and I cried to see their pictures. God bless you and your family.
May I ask how you found this? What she wrote that is?
@MiraclesDHappen, that's exactly what I thought too (about leaving comments) because I really, really wanted to tear her a new one.
I was going to write a post on my homeschooling page and mistyped the blog name, so google returned a search screen and as I was about to click on my blog (which came up first), I saw this and clicked on it.
WOW! How dare she! I couldn't read the whole thing but what i read is enough. How horribly mean and insensitve, and honestly just plane ignorant. Just b/c she has read does not mean she understands your struggle so she should want to keep her mouth shut. I'd like to say hopefully she won't have to go through what we've gone through but at this moment it would be a lie. But i do hope that she gains some kind of understanding. Sending you HUGS and tell her if it's so Disturbing to Stay Off your blog.
Michelle, I found your link through my friends page (Antoinette)....I am so incredibly sickened and sorry for you having to even read this and sorry for the coward that wrote it. What a sick piece of trash to act as if she/he knows all & knows what any parent that looses a child should do. She wants to play judge so badly maybe she should take a look at her life or better read read a book (The Shack is great) about judging. Really wish that person wasn't such a coward.
Again, so very sorry you have had to deal with such trash. May peace be with you.
Michelle, I found your link through my friends page (Antoinette)....I am so incredibly sickened and sorry for you having to even read this and sorry for the coward that wrote it. What a sick piece of trash to act as if she/he knows all & knows what any parent that looses a child should do. She wants to play judge so badly maybe she should take a look at her life or better read read a book (The Shack is great) about judging. Really wish that person wasn't such a coward.
Again, so very sorry you have had to deal with such trash. May peace be with you.
First of all, I admittedly did not read the entire piece (too many words of too little substance).
After skimming it, however, I went ahead and clicked on the link to this "nutjob's" website. I thought something was wrong with my computer when the link sent me back to you. Then I realized, "she is talking about YOU!"
Um, seriously? She obviously has no clue. I do hope this isn't bothering you; its not worth your effort.
People like this say they are disgusted and whatnot. If they are so disgusted then why do they linger and read through posts and look at pictures. If I was disgusted by something I sure as heck wouldn't do that. I'd just leave and forget about it. Sorry they are pointing you out. Ridiculous.
Oh Michele... I am so sorry. That little "essay" has me furious on your behalf. People who have never experienced losses just don't get it, this we know, but to be so openly critical and judgmental for absolutely no reason is just beyond normal ignorance and inconsideration. {hugs}
I know how to leave comments to this women if anyone wants the link let me know.
This is baffling to me. I stopped reading after a paragraph because I was disgusted by the content and because I didn't want that person to have the satisfaction of being read.
May I ask how you found this? I sure wish you hadn't seen it. :( Some people are so full of hatred. And this is further proof to me that, unless you've experienced infertility and babyloss, you cannot understand it. So many 'fertiles' are so completely devoid of empathy for those of us who have struggled.
xxx
I have no words other than I am so sorry. I am in shock.
I should have left a comment long ago. I've been reading your blog for a while now. I've been so touched by your words. My son was born the same month as Maya & Bobby - I was on bedrest for my pregnancy & came across your blog that way... Anyway, I just wanted to finally say thank you for sharing your words, your faith, and your love through your blog.
I could only read some of what this person wrote before I stopped. It was heartless. I then clicked to the main page of their blog - even more clear that there is something really sad & wrong with this person. I'm sorry that this person decided to take out their own misery and pain on you and your life.
Sending hugs.
Dear Michele, please take down the link. That jerk doesn't deserve any traffic thanks to you. My stomach hurt, I couldn't even finish reading it. Why is there so much hatred, so much needless cruelty in this world? I'm so sorry hon. *hugs*
What an ugly soul that woman has. I am not at all surprised that she has comments turned off on that post - she must realize how disgusting and wrong she is. How dare she call your babies - all of our babies - "tissue"? When do babies become "babies" in her mind?
I am just so sorry that you had to come across such ugliness and hatred, Michele.
I don't comment enough but I just had to say that I am so sorry you even had to read that! I couldn't even read the whole thing, it was just horrible and disgusting! Doesn't make sense how someone could write such vile things about your family and the other families as well. I'm happy you have your babies (and the memory of all your babies) to snuggle tonight and I hope you realize the author must have nothing.
Just so we're clear Michelle... I've lost a baby in infancy... and I consider your "miscarriages" just as devastating a loss as what we went through with my baby girl.. They are your children. They all had birthdays and due dates and futures unfulfilled.
Ignore this idiot. She clearly has her own effed up issues and seriously, this is all about her, not you.
And to have a go at us smiling with our babies? Um, hello, we DO LOVE THEM. The photo of me kissing Jordan was taken when she was dying. Is that disgusting too?
So sorry Michele. There are some bored and nasty people out there.
Oh my word. I feel like I just wasted 10 minutes of my life reading that. I am speechless, and feel horrible for you.... I can't believe that someone would take the time to write such filth. How in the world did they even come across your blog.. and if they didn't like what they saw, why would they not just X out of it and never look at it again? From what they wrote, it sounded like they read every single one of your posts on ALL of your blogs. I know you know that the things they said weren't true, but I just wanted to say that I think it's great that you got SO many comments on this post, from people who support you. I think the way you remember your children is beautiful.
Oh my word. I feel like I just wasted 10 minutes of my life reading that. I am speechless, and feel horrible for you.... I can't believe that someone would take the time to write such filth. How in the world did they even come across your blog.. and if they didn't like what they saw, why would they not just X out of it and never look at it again? From what they wrote, it sounded like they read every single one of your posts on ALL of your blogs. I know you know that the things they said weren't true, but I just wanted to say that I think it's great that you got SO many comments on this post, from people who support you. I think the way you remember your children is beautiful.
That made me cry and made me so angry. I'm so sorry you had to read that awfulness! I couldn't actually read most of it because I was so disgusted for you.
:( Bless you beautiful. You are the exact opposite of that nasty picture that they tried to paint of you. Some people make me so so very sick.
You are inspiring, sweet and they way you honour and cherish each of your children is truly beautiful. Although I'm sure you know that <3
Michele, I'm so sorry you had to read that. What a terrible thing to say. I couldn't even read all of it. You are an amazing person and you've been such a great support to SO MANY of us.
For the record, I love that you post pictures of your children. They are beautiful.
Please don't believe a word of that rant. Your blog gives people hope.
It's hard for me to say, but I hope that person never has to feel that pain that you have gone through. That they never realize why you need this blog and why the ALI community needs you.
I'm so sorry.
Michelle.
Oh, Michelle.
You and your blog are a tribute to your sweet, beautiful children. ALL of them.
I am so sorry.
I can't even believe this person has that much time on their hands. What an ass!! Excuse my language. *hugs* I am sorry Michele.
I'm so so so so so so sorry Michelle. How can someone be so HIDEOUSLY evil to another human? EVEN one they don't know?
Please take all of our warm wishes and love and block out that shit. I wish the coward had identified him or herself in some way. How in the hell does he/she know how one "should" grieve, and what right to put out that hideous diatribe??
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
There are such disgusting people out there..why would you go to such lengths to patronize and criticize someone else's pain, especially when they haven't experienced it before. I just don't understand it..How did you even find that site? Don't tell me they sent you the link. Bloody rubbish of society.
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