tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post7300151721578581759..comments2023-10-26T04:01:17.116-04:00Comments on My Life After Loss: Blasphemous RantMichelehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681333723382119281noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-2473167974201068382011-02-01T23:55:51.035-05:002011-02-01T23:55:51.035-05:00In tears...tears that I am convinced will never en...In tears...tears that I am convinced will never end this side of heaven. My daughter should have just turned one, and instead her little body is on the ground.<br /><br />Although I have left the depths of despair, the anger still rears it's ugly head now and again. I too believe it must be let out, lest it should consume us.<br /><br />I believe parents who lose children in such a way are faced with a conflict so many others do not, cannot understand. Our child's death was not at the hands of any other human being, and as such, we have only God to "blame". We have only Him to yell at, to curse, to take down off of the wall and stick in the bottom of a drawer because you cannot stand to look at His face. As the author of life, HE did this, HE could have stopped this, and HE did not.<br /><br />This does help me to realize how magnificent heaven must be, for if upon arrival every tear and every sorrow is wiped away, even my deep, deep grief will disappear, then wow; I cannot even fathom such power. In the meantime, my tears are all I have left. They are all I can give my children whom I cannot hold, cannot feed, and cannot watch run across the yard. Somehow they, my tears, count for something.Amyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08734385442507942513noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-40500931674724354922011-02-01T23:04:45.075-05:002011-02-01T23:04:45.075-05:00Say what you need to say - that's important. I...Say what you need to say - that's important. I can't speak for your other reader-friends but I can handle it and I'm asking those questions right along with you. :(one-hit_wonderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02392238740961497297noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-33455147129696176252011-02-01T18:21:10.177-05:002011-02-01T18:21:10.177-05:00Michelle,
My heart just hurts for you. Little Nich...Michelle,<br />My heart just hurts for you. Little Nicholas SHOULD be here, running around laughing, having his curls tousled by his momma and daddy, helping to make his special dinner. He SHOULD be here. I will never understand the injustice of this world. Maybe when we go to that next place we go the lightbulb will go off and it will all make sense, but not now. Now it just feels too cruel for words. Holding you close and abiding with you. <br /><br />Your other post, when you say "3 years ago, today was the last day of my life. The woman who emerged after the next day would never be the same." Never have truer words been spoken.<br /><br />Thinking of you <br />xxOnce A Motherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15974149780531831971noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-90446573351903844762011-02-01T18:09:25.656-05:002011-02-01T18:09:25.656-05:00I am so sorry Michele. Sending many mnay hugs. x...I am so sorry Michele. Sending many mnay hugs. xxSophiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17663682329663202706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-58801307359881946852011-02-01T17:49:43.764-05:002011-02-01T17:49:43.764-05:00Oh my dear. I can't say it better than you alr...Oh my dear. I can't say it better than you already have, there are no answers. <br /><br />I hope your oldest boy is held so safe in those arms xoCatherine Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01618295389400457254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-51202900567029695672011-02-01T16:01:37.581-05:002011-02-01T16:01:37.581-05:00I'm so sorry my friend...(((HUGS)))I'm so sorry my friend...(((HUGS)))trenniahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208738689962789823noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-79975889588576537912011-02-01T15:39:15.282-05:002011-02-01T15:39:15.282-05:00It's grief. It's pain. And it goes on......It's grief. It's pain. And it goes on...and on.<br /><br />Yes...your questions and screams are valid. <br /><br />No...none of it is fair.<br /><br />I'm so sorry...<br /><br />I'm sorry for the losses that are so needless and painful. I'm sorry for the continued unknowing. I'm so sorry...because it's simply painful.<br /><br />All the stories of the resurrected. I remember asking the same thing...why them, why not my twins? <br /><br />My aunt once told me not to worry and to have faith...told me my children would always be protected. I remember wondering why MY children were more important than the little children dying of starvation and intestinal worms overseas. I wondered how she could say that. And then...when my eldest's brain was smashed on the pavement, altering his life into mental illness and a lifetime of social security..and when my twins were ripped from me in death...I remembered that wondering. And I knew...my babies, they were just as vulnerable as EVERYONE'S babies. They were not "protected". <br /><br />And I was so angry about it.<br /><br />Angry about what people say to calm and comfort us. <br /><br />I'm so sorry...<br />With love...and understanding.Emerging Butterflyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03308150825693906532noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-12313300270052219392011-02-01T15:32:17.112-05:002011-02-01T15:32:17.112-05:00thinking of you today.
about your other post...we...thinking of you today.<br /><br />about your other post...we truly are not the people we were before.<br /><br />big (((hugs)))Rebahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16739267142330427759noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-80779575848189531872011-02-01T13:53:10.637-05:002011-02-01T13:53:10.637-05:00The anniversarys are the hardest. Hardest to get t...The anniversarys are the hardest. Hardest to get through the day. Hardest to imagine the "what if's." I know I constantly wonder what my babies would be doing if they were still alive. It's tough. There are days where I just want to fall apart, but I think thats okay. I think its fine for us to sit there and mourn our dead children. To be angry at those mothers who chose to kill the baby growing inside of them, or those children who they cant stand to listen to them cry. I'm angry. I'm sad, frustrated. I question things daily. But its good to let it out. Botteling it up, will only do harm to our mentality. So scream, cry, vent, question as much as you like!Mrs.Hunt2006https://www.blogger.com/profile/05231056517997448675noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-86688110452044820702011-02-01T12:51:14.903-05:002011-02-01T12:51:14.903-05:00I wouldn't dare try to "talk you down&quo...I wouldn't dare try to "talk you down" . . . know why? Because I agree with every single word you typed. I admit I skimmed it because I started sobbing and couldn't see straight, but what I have managed to read through my blurry, snotty, tears, I agree with 100%.<br /><br />Nobody had better dare suggest "Reason" for dead children. Or children who are ill. Or children born with physical or mental problems. <br /><br />As you know, I am struggling here, too, and I keep going back to what a preist said to me in May 2007 . . . "God doesn't punish parents or childen this way. He cries with us. He holds them until we can again."<br /><br />I am here with you, not on the same journey of course, but beside you, and validating your feelings and reasonings. <br /><br />Wuv you.Ms. Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04734867984972785143noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-88804492573690234022011-02-01T12:39:07.118-05:002011-02-01T12:39:07.118-05:00Sending you that big hug, Michele. I felt so angr...Sending you that big hug, Michele. I felt so angry at God during my IF, but that doesn't hold a candle to what you have endured. God can take it, let it out. I wish I knew why -- it is so unfair the way the world works, so confusing.quadmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17254199098599230245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-66811791649162048122011-02-01T12:08:46.532-05:002011-02-01T12:08:46.532-05:00Dear, sweet, Michele,
There are no words of comfor...Dear, sweet, Michele,<br />There are no words of comfort that I could possibly offer that would ease the pain. The coincidence of that particular reading is very difficult. It just seems to rip the wounds open. Thank you for sharing your feelings, as I think the sign of a friend is to share not only the joys, but also the tough times (and I really feel like the blogging BLM's are my friends). So please, just accept a HUGE hug from me...hugs and understanding my friend.Joannahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05823767091787001229noreply@blogger.com