tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post4084882857867721767..comments2023-10-26T04:01:17.116-04:00Comments on My Life After Loss: GuiltMichelehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681333723382119281noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-39332280216547521482009-09-28T09:30:29.125-04:002009-09-28T09:30:29.125-04:00I think all the other ladies summed it up so well....I think all the other ladies summed it up so well. You are a success story - even more so because you've gone through the pain and heartache - and have survived it. Your little babies are proof of that. I think most of us are so hard on ourselves and don't recogize all that we have accomplished. You've had your share of pain, so I am SO happy that you're finally able to experience some joy and happiness. You are an inspiration to me!Justinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14155563108211166396noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-44633119856780785722009-09-24T11:58:14.995-04:002009-09-24T11:58:14.995-04:00You know, we feel what we feel... it comes in wave...You know, we feel what we feel... it comes in waves, ebb and flow... guilt, remorse, sadness, joy, gratitude, love... it's all there... <br /><br />They are so beautiful, mama. I just look at them and smile and smile and smile... :)Inannahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03696628144350223948noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-40837044402520625312009-09-23T14:40:27.713-04:002009-09-23T14:40:27.713-04:00You should not feel guilty! You have your babies ...You should not feel guilty! You have your babies in heaven and now on earth. ((hugs)) Thinking of youChristmas with Kaseyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04046209441729981789noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-64528034958604548862009-09-22T20:04:02.239-04:002009-09-22T20:04:02.239-04:00They are just beautiful. Sorry about the pain but ...They are just beautiful. Sorry about the pain but it sounds like your doing pretty well. It is major surgery, it takes time to heal. I am sorry about the guilt. Obviously you know what it's like to read about the success stories when yours hadn't gone that way. I get that but also didn't the success stories, even if you wished they were yours, give you hope that your day would come? Look what you have been through, look at the babies you lost, it's your time to shine. Take what God has given you and say Thank You.Debby@Just Breathehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11685398064340027809noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-46802682994063212902009-09-22T17:49:08.797-04:002009-09-22T17:49:08.797-04:00You DEFINITELY are a success story. I understand y...You DEFINITELY are a success story. I understand your feelings and I wish there was something that could help with that. You are blessed and I know you know that as well. It is amazing that with everything you have going on and everything you have to think about you still are thinking of every one else. I think the guilt is part of the whole IF process but you deserve your happiness...you deserve your beautiful babies and I am so so happy for your success. It gives me hope!Michellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03661220372372737455noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-76563566692235973142009-09-22T17:45:38.104-04:002009-09-22T17:45:38.104-04:00I feel guilty for being an Urban Myth. I feel gui...I feel guilty for being an Urban Myth. I feel guilty for being a "cheat" or disloyal to the adoptive community. I feel guilty for the slew of comments and inquiries (more than we already get) that Lil Pumpkin will be exposed to because of this pending child inside me.<br /><br />Now, you will tell me to not to feel guilty, and I will tell you the same, and we can both cross each other out, eh?!<br /><br />I love these new photos, with their sweet eyes open!!!<br /><br />P.S. Instead of feeling guilty, I think you should try and re-frame it as being an inspiration to those we have lost babies, and ache to try again. You certainly have earned your stripes, honey. I am sorry you have had to go through so much pain and loss though, to get to this point :o(Ms. Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04734867984972785143noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-28277763160740233202009-09-22T16:31:32.355-04:002009-09-22T16:31:32.355-04:00I'm so very behind from being out of town, but...I'm so very behind from being out of town, but I just wanted to say I'm so glad to hear that things are going well with the babes. They are both beautiful. :)Barefoothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17514231523278098569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-29110903034392860792009-09-22T16:27:44.101-04:002009-09-22T16:27:44.101-04:00What everyone else said. Never apologize for havi...What everyone else said. Never apologize for having your life. You may of course take time to be thankful and grateful, and other people's stories may enhance those feelings. But no sorry's. Sorry!<br /><br />They're really lovely.Tashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07376651134993450207noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-53753107751806786552009-09-22T15:44:42.111-04:002009-09-22T15:44:42.111-04:00I wish I knew what to say to help you not feel gui...I wish I knew what to say to help you not feel guilty. I do understand - I have felt it that way about various things in my life. I remember feeling it when my baby was doing so well in utero for having no fluid, but other babies in similar scenarios were losing their babies along the way. If Madelyn had lived, I know I would feel guilty having to go back and tell others who had lost their babies. So I can sort of understand how you must feel now. And while it can be hard to see other babies so soon after a loss, I don't think anyone can deny you deserve this - you have been through so much. And you are so supportive and caring - no one could be anything but happy for you. I know that I am. :)Heatherhttp://www.heathermohr.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-44740113732459987082009-09-22T12:57:14.782-04:002009-09-22T12:57:14.782-04:00I haven't read all yet, And I CAN NOT WAIT TO ...I haven't read all yet, And I CAN NOT WAIT TO READ ON THE BABIES. YOUR BABIES.MY BABIES. THE INTERNETS BABIES, Bobby & Maya!! <br /><br /> I have read Peter and your Story and your faith in our creator. I hold no ill because your holding live babies. I came here and Prayed that you would get live take home babies that were problem free and I Prayed for my life that this would happen for you. <br /><br /> And now the tears start, because I don't know if you have thought of this or not, though I am sure you have a zillion times, as I did when I was older, and found out what the f a cerclage was.<br /><br /> My Two sets of Doubles and many single losses, because until the end of my journey with the PCOS, Endo et I didn't know I had a true IC. A simple little stitch and I may have a baby or two here. And every time a new year comes I picture what life would have been like with them and how this kid is the same age (God has blessed me as the Bible said as being Mother of the town uh or something like that.)as Amanda, Ozzy & Care Bear and their wee one, Timmy, ET ET. All the kids in this town and my Ozzy & CareBear who is in Texas. My "not my blood" adopted kids. I feel I did a good job with the kids God placed in my life but I do believe having Angel Babies to look forward to is what gets me through sometimes that after this life it will indeed be better. All this to say, Please Michele don't allow yourself to feel guilty about what you were blessed with. You are truly Gods children in every sense of the word and you really did get two Miracle Babies. I scream here on my couch in excitement to hear how well they are doing.<br /><br /> Everyone should just simply be so happy for you. You have a specific issue that I understand. And I know when you look at sweet Sophia, Alex and Nick or even Bobby and Maya that nagging thought isn't far from you and probably cripples you as it did me, What if someone told me about the stitch before? And with that (I am in the twenties, my kids would be in their twenties. Its a crazy thought that comes up a lot, It never goes away) I know you suffer silently and I wish only the very best for your two Miracles. I don't want to see one road block for you all. You have had a mountain already to climb. Try to enjoy the view as hard as I know its gotta be. I love you my new friend and your family. Keep on being beautiful and know you have many soul sisters who understand. xoxo, Kandi Ann<br /><br />WHOA DUDE. My captcha is heellyed (HEALED) neat!Kandi Annhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02410855500274321915noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-7801550234780817422009-09-22T11:20:03.797-04:002009-09-22T11:20:03.797-04:00The babies look GREAT. They are getting nice and ...The babies look GREAT. They are getting nice and plump. YAY YAY YAY. :-D<br /><br />And I agree with the other comments. . . There is no reason to feel guilty. We all deal with pain in our lives, but the wonderful thing is that we're able to deal with our own pain and still rejoice in other people's successes. I want nothing more than for your beautiful children to continue to grow and prosper. You deserve that. :-DLeahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14912857890584533572noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-67472560760639262772009-09-22T10:37:54.840-04:002009-09-22T10:37:54.840-04:00Michele,
I am so sorry that I've missed the p...Michele,<br /><br />I am so sorry that I've missed the past week. I don't have a good excuse, other than lack of internet time, but I'm so sorry I missed the birth post of your BEAUTIFUL babies!<br /><br />(you have beautiful babies! <i>This is so amazing!</i>)<br /><br />I am so happy for you and so excited for you and crying such tears of joy for Maya and Bobby. <br /><br />Lots of love to you, sweet girl. <br /><br />NatalieMrs. Clinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03159647878101862171noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-89201320673462343872009-09-22T10:37:54.110-04:002009-09-22T10:37:54.110-04:00You are such a wonderful person for even thinking ...You are such a wonderful person for even thinking of these things. Only someone who has been through the hope and the sadness, the loss and the love can be mindful of these things.Mother Knows Best Reviewshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07127811116486063201noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-65871707460642652652009-09-22T10:30:04.540-04:002009-09-22T10:30:04.540-04:00Oh Michele, don't ever feel guilty. I can tel...Oh Michele, don't ever feel guilty. I can tell you that I always wondered the same thing. I didn't know when was time to call it a victory. I feel that everyday is a victory with Jess and you should feel that way too. I was looking at the pictures and OMG at Maya's hair. That is a head FULL of blonde hair. I was wondering who in the family is so fair as you and DH have dark hair. Oh How they are so beautiful. I can see so much growth in them already. Still praying for you and yours.Jennihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16499502329602777628noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-48097096660155716542009-09-22T10:21:40.893-04:002009-09-22T10:21:40.893-04:00Wow your babies are gorgeous! Bobby looks so much ...Wow your babies are gorgeous! Bobby looks so much like your husband with his prominent dark hair. And Maya's so beautiful too.Michellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10878562715014004523noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-41558967728682285852009-09-22T09:40:15.516-04:002009-09-22T09:40:15.516-04:00Michele, don't feel guilty. This is your blog ...Michele, don't feel guilty. This is your blog and you write what you need to write. If an update is too painful for someone, they have the option of whether or not to follow your blog or they can decide to not read for that day. You have been through so much that you deserve all the happiness that Bobby and Maya are bringing you. *hugs*Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-27159432569125847142009-09-22T09:34:02.532-04:002009-09-22T09:34:02.532-04:00I wish I could take those feelings of guilt away f...I wish I could take those feelings of guilt away from you my dear. I agree with all the previous commentators, you are an inspiration. xoCatherine Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01618295389400457254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-43535203885916497662009-09-22T09:27:20.704-04:002009-09-22T09:27:20.704-04:00I guess there is 'survivors' guilt but Mic...I guess there is 'survivors' guilt but Michele you have made me so happy (and I am sure others too)just thinking of the love you have for Alexander, Sophie and Nicholas and also the way Bobby and Maya are doing so well. I treasure the prayer card you sent me and the love it represents. God has given you 2 beautiful babies. I know it hurts to see others lose babies but you can pray for them as others have prayed for you. God gives us comfort as we walk thru the hard times and you can pray for comfort for them. Love, AnneAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-47017029404658984562009-09-22T09:15:01.664-04:002009-09-22T09:15:01.664-04:00Oh they are so precious and seem to be getting str...Oh they are so precious and seem to be getting stronger each day-I think that bobby looks like peter so far..I think you are sweet to care about other peoples feelings the way you do,as for me I read your post and am so happy for you and know that you have face so much to get to this point and you give me hope for my future..Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-21676660912041796232009-09-22T08:45:53.080-04:002009-09-22T08:45:53.080-04:00You really are a success story. You have two beau...You really are a success story. You have two beautiful babies who are thriving. And through everything you were an inspiration to all of us in this babyloss community. You had your ups and downs - but you always had faith.<br /><br />There is always some degree of guilt. But those of us who really care and support each other can feel those pangs of envy that you mention - but we can overcome them - to be there for the happy times that others deserve to celebrate too. I've felt those pricks and stabs but that's part of learing to live with a loss. <br /><br />I'm glad you are healing quickly and I hope you can be completely pain free soon! Try not to push yourself to hard. You need some TLC too!Donnahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05054869953538170225noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-88673783394429885652009-09-22T08:24:28.236-04:002009-09-22T08:24:28.236-04:00Michele,
You have no reason to feel guilty. Your...Michele,<br /><br />You have no reason to feel guilty. Your story is a story of inspiration to other mothers. You have angels in heaven and it was your time to have angels on earth. It is truly a blessings and others who thought they would never make it pass a certain day can now read your blog and be encouraged that maybe they too can make it pass that precious viability point.A n Thttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16938107811730310326noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1809677799536184324.post-52936254803842383562009-09-22T08:12:20.282-04:002009-09-22T08:12:20.282-04:00NEVER FEEL GUILTY.
Life is to short to burden yo...NEVER FEEL GUILTY. <br /><br />Life is to short to burden yourself with those feelings.<br /><br />Feel blessed that you are here and now, and right now, you have 2 very sweet little babies, and they have brothers and sisters that are in heaven watching over them. Keeping them safe and you safe.Krystalhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05895416264460211082noreply@blogger.com